Quotes about attachment

A secure attachment is the ability to bond to develop a secure and safe base...

When attachment does not occur when someone gives flowers and no abhorrence occurs when someone throws stones that is considered equanimity.

The worldly vision is filled with infinite infatuations and attachments and no one can escape from it [hence] there is no alternative other than staying in Gnani’s feet [surrendering to the enlightened one is the only alternative].

When there is no attachment-abhorrence one is on the path of liberation [moksha].

It is regarded as axiomatic that parents have more power then children. This is an inescapable biological fact young children are completely dependent on their parents or other caring adults for survival.

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions reality can be obtained only by someone who is detached.

Physical pleasures are not associated with attachment-abhorrence the belief in an opinion itself is attachment-abhorrence.

The mind doesn’t harass you your attachment-abhorrence harasses you!

The primary driver to pathological dissociation is attachment disorganization in early life: when that is followed by severe and repeated trauma, then a major disorder of structural dissociation is created (Lyons-Ruth, Dutra, Schuder, & Bianchi, 2006).

I smiled and looked at her- there she was with such a genuine grin and twinkle in her eyes. I kissed my mother on her forehead and took a long look in to her hazel eyes. I wondered when I would have the next chance to see her as I whispered, 'I love you." Mother didn't respond. She didn't look well- she had a tint of green and yellow to her skin and her thinning hair was a dull salt and pepper color, cut extra short and clinging to her scalp. She had no makeup on, which told me she just had no m

I thought of Bobby, of the last look he had given me, and at that moment I understood one of the differences between man and cat: man knows he's going to die, so he can get ready and be willing, even eager, to go. A cat knows the end is near, but that's all. He can't accept death: he can't trust in it; cats are perhaps too metaphysical an entity to need to believe in the idea of a beyond; a cat is his own god and man his creation.

If giving my everything is what it takes, I won't hesitate, not for even a second. That's what it means to have something you'd give your life to keep safe.

It was my letting go that gave me a better hold.

The possessions themselves were not the problem, it was my relationship with possessing.

We should not allow ourselves to be deceived by our outward show of ‘civilized’ manners and ‘cultured’ social behavior into believing that self-concern, desirous attachment, aversion, and indifference are steadily losing their hold over us.

If we take something to be the truth, we may cling to it so much that when the truth comes and knocks on our door, we won't want to let it in.

We will martyr ourselves, suffering under the weight of a non-reciprocal relationship until some part of us bursts in protest. Suddenly, we lose our mind, and allowing ourselves to heap all manner of nastiness, name calling, patronizing, death threats on the “deserving” jerk who has it coming after all we do for him/her! As the final insult rings across the room and we regain consciousness, we are horrified by what has come out of our mouth. After all, we LOVE these people, and we quickly move i

Anxiously attached Codependents demonstrate the ability to maximize the attention they get from their partner, regardless of whether it is positive or negative (i.e., "I'd rather be screamed at than ignored"). Manipulation is used to keep the inattentive or inconsistent partner involved by alternating dramatic angry demands with needy dependence. When the partner is preoccupied and not paying attention, the anxious Codependent explodes in angry demands and behaviors that cannot be ignored.

It was two years ago that I first met Yuki. I remember that painfully thin figure covered in dirt: malnourished, exhausted and carrying a sleeping child in his arms like it's the most precious thing in the world.

Throughout history, the most brutal cultures have always been distinguished by maternal-infant separation.

At the end, we will arrive where we started.

Why was I holding on to something that would never be mine? But isn't that what people do?

Affection is a much profound emotion, which is inexplicable but can be fathomed through our pores. It percolates down our skin slowly.

I am more emotionally attached to book characters than actual people in my life.

I know every single street in this town. And I love strolling these streets in the mornings, in the evenings, and then at night when I am merry and tipsy. I love to have breakfasts with my friends along the Bosphorus on Sundays, I love to walk alone amid the crowds. I am in love with the chaotic beauty of this city, the ferries, the music, the tales, the sadness, the colors, and the black humor.....

The capacity to form attachments on equal terms is considered evidence of emotional maturity. It is the absence of this capacity which is pathological. Whether there may be other criteria of emotional maturity, like the capacity to be alone, is seldom taken into account.

The very matrix of our ability to love and bond in later life, maternal sensitivity – or lack thereof – also determines cultural tenor.

Dare to live by letting go.

Home's where you go when you run out of homes.

Home is a notion that only nations of the homeless fully appreciate and only the uprooted comprehend.

If you simply get detach from yourself, it gets easier for you to see, how you perceive life.

Practice giving things away, not just things you don't care about, but things you do like. Remember, it is not the size of a gift, it is its quality and the amount of mental attachment you overcome that count. So don't bankrupt yourself on a momentary positive impulse, only to regret it later. Give thought to giving. Give small things, carefully, and observe the mental processes going along with the act of releasing the little thing you liked. (53)(Quote is actually Robert A F Thurman but Huston

Materialism, attachment to things of the world, includes pride. Many religious people suffer from pride: taking pleasure or even delight in being good, or religious.

[D]etachment means letting go and nonattachment means simply letting be. (95)

By developing a contaminated, stigmatized identity, the child victim takes the evil of the abuser into herself and thereby preserves her primary attachments to her parents. Because the inner sense of badness preserves a relationship, it is not readily given up even after the abuse has stopped; rather, it becomes a stable part of the child's personality structure.

Chemistry is not destiny, certainly. But these scientists have demonstrated that the most reliable way to produce an adult who is brave and curious and kind and prudent is to ensure that when he is an infant, his hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal axis functions well. And how do you do that? It is not magic. First, as much as possible, you protect him from serious trauma and chronic stress; then, even more important, you provide him with a secure, nurturing relationship with at least one parent and

My affection for you is not my problem.

Let go of the attachment, keep the lesson

Theirs was a tug-of-war and neither could let go. Both felt the burn and still wouldn't let go. Some might call it a game for neither could admit defeat.

Attachment to the external always suffocates inner peace.

Been Contented goes beyond our material wants; contentment sets us free from the illusion of having more or “Better things”, or expecting “better times" it sets us free from the illusion that somehow things should be different.

In this paper I propose the existence of two distinct presentations of DID, a Stable and an Active one. While people with Stable DID struggle with their traumatic past, with triggers that re-evoke that past and with the problems of daily functioning with severe dissociation, people with Active DID are, in addition, also engaged in a life of current, on-going involvement in abusive relationships, and do not respond to treatment in the same way as other DID patients. The paper observes these two p

The secret self knows the anguish of our attachments and assures us that letting go of what we think we must have to be happy is the same as letting go of our unhappiness.

Life is a combo of attachment and detachment. Love is the most natural thing and you are bound to get attached to persons, places and things. However, while getting attached so, you should know that all these attachments too have an expiry date. It's exactly at that point that the art of detachment helps. Persons, places and things are meant for specific periods in life after which you should know how to let go and embrace newer things. The world is beautiful and you should have belief in Him.

... sexual abuse by the mother is considered to he one of the most traumatic forms of abuse. In some ways it's the ultimate betrayal.

I want to see her naked, " Mengele said pointing to Marlene. She cried and shock. My mother flung her body in front of Marlene's and said, "You can't have her. I love her, my daughter." My father said, "Take the younger one. She's smarter, " as he pushed me over forward.Marlene cried because father said I was smarter even though he was just trying to manipulate Mengele. The doctor's chest grew large.

I may appear stand off-ish but I'm not. I just let go of my attachment to things.

Do not become attached to anything that can destroy you in the course of time.

As children become increasingly less connected to adults, they rely more and more on each other; the whole natural order of things change. In the natural order of all mammalian cultures, animals or humans, the young stay under the wings of adults until they themselves reach adulthood. Immature creatures were never meant to bring one another to maturity. They were never meant to look to one another for primary nurturing, modelling, cue giving or mentoring. They are not equipped to give one anothe

The greatest challenge of parenting is in the inner work it requires: the strength and confidence in believing that we are not in control of, but the answer for our children.

Whether something is wonderful or horrible, the most harmful thought we can think is “Will this last forever?

We are taught to be free from all vices of life. No greed, anger, lust, and attachment with any mundane things.

When two persons are too close, they fall apart.

Let a man leave anger, let him forsake pride, let him overcome all bondage! No sufferings befall the man who is not attached to name and form and who calls nothing his own.[Verse 221] TR- Friedrich Max Müller

Lust, anger, attachment, greed, over pride be,Jealousy, selfishness, injustice, cruelty, ego truly;- 153 -

ATTACHMENT IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL!" Myth: 'Money is the root of all evil.' It's just a wrong interpretation of a wise ancient message. TRUTH: 'LUST(GREED) OF MONEY(ANYTHING) IS THE ROOT OF ALL EVIL.' ~ UNIVERSE LOVES YOU & SO DO I ‪#‎StardustAK‬ PS. For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. ( 1 Timothy 6:10 )

We get attached to people, a job, material things and a certain state of being. And, when something around us changes we suffer.Release the need to control people, release the believe there is only one job you can do, release the need to accumulate material things, welcome the unknown and set yourself free.

To empty the heart does not mean to not love. On the contrary, true love, as God intented it, is purest when it is not based on a false attachment. The process of first emptying the heart can be found in the beginning half of the shahada (declaration of faith).

Hadn't another wise man, the Buddha himself, warned about the evils of attachment?

I have a neuroscience background - that's what my doctorate is in - and I was trained to study hormones of attachment, so I definitely feel my parenting is informed by that.

Attachment parenting is not a passive parenting style.

[Let] go of your attachments: your attachment to being right, to having total control, or to living forever. This process of letting go is integral to the process of becoming whole.

The capacity for dissociation enables the young child to exercise their innate life-sustaining need for attachment in spite of the fact that principal attachment figures are also principal abusers.

Non-possession” does not mean having nothing. It does not mean to live as a penniless beggar. Rather than meaning having nothing, it is the idea of not possessing what we do not need. The more we possess, The more we have attachments.

The Root Cause of Our Problems is The Attachment To Possessions and #Desire for more.#KnowThyself

It is not the outer objects that entangle us. It is the inner clinging that entangles us." - Tilopa

There is no more destructive force in human affairs -- not greed, not hatred -- than the desire to have been right. Non-attachment to possessions is trivial when compared with non-attachment to opinions.

When I consider the men (like my father) I have treated in psychotherapy, I recognize the challenge I face as a counselor. These men are in counseling due to an insistent wife, troubled child or their own addiction. They suffer a lack of connection with the people they say they love most. Chronically accused of being over controlling or emotionally absent, they feel at sea when their wives and children claim to be lonely in their presence. How can these people feel “un-loved” when (from his pers

[On marriage and permanent attach

Relationships for women are more than taking off the clothes and wearing them back. It is about attachment of emotions, and feelings, but on the other hand, men are like fast and furious.

At the most basic level, therefore, secure attachments in both childhood and adulthood are established by two individual's sharing a nonverbal focus on the energy flow (emotional states) and a verbal focus on the information-processing aspects (representational processes of memory and narrative) of mental life. The matter of the mind matters for secure attachments.

Friendship is not a remedy for loneliness. Loneliness is part of our experience, and if we are looking for relief from loneliness in friendship, we are only going to frustrate the friendship. Friendship, camaraderie, intimacy, all those things, and loneliness lived together in the same experience.

Resistance is the subtlest form of attachment.

He has no need for faith who knows the uncreated, who has cut off rebirth, who has destroyed any opportunity for good or evil, and cast away all desire. He is indeed the ultimate man.

Attachment strangles freedom and clarity and makes us a puppet to our desires and cravings; attachment is the root of suffering, a root that if left unattended grows into a tree which drops the fruits of anger, greed, envy, dispersion, competitiveness, ego and pain

The past is no good if you can't learn from it; therefore, no sense in dwelling on it.

Your personality of the mind is like a castle of sand around the sea. The time you begin to disassociate yourself with different experiences and impressions of both the external and internal world, you won’t find anything inside.

Where people are really attached, poverty itself is wealth.

Why are...poor people more ready to share their goods than rich people? The answer is easy: The poor have little to lose; the rich have more to lose and they are more attached to their possessions. Poverty provides a deeper motivation for understanding your neighbors, welcoming others and attending to those who are suffering. I would go so far as to say that poverty helps you understand what happiness is, what serenity is in life.

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions reality can be attained only by someone who is detached.

There is no means other than vitrag-science (science that frees us from all attachments) that will give Final-Liberation [Moksha]. Other means [methods, instruments] will cause bondage; they only help to pass the time; [whereas] means to attain the Eternal Thing (experience of Pure Soul) can be attained from the ‘Gnani Purush’ (the enlightened one).

Keep on doing whatever it is that you have been doing; but, do no attachment-abhorrence. If ‘You’ stay in ‘Your [Pure Soul] state’; attachment-abhorrence will not occur.

My-ness (mamta) is indeed parigrah [attachment to material objects]; material object is not a parigrah. Gnani doesn’t have My-ness (mamata), He has the eternal element (experience of Pure Soul).

Once you understand the innate nature (relative self, prakruti) of the other person, you can remain in an attachment-free state with that person. It is Knowledge (Gnan) to understand the innate nature of a person, and once Knowledge arises, so will conduct.

The Soul is neither a Jain nor a Vaishnav. The Soul is Vitarag (free from attachment). This is the religion of the Vitarag (the enlightened ones).

Awareness (of the Self) prevails in matters where one becomes attachment-free (vitrag), and where one has attachment-abhorrence, there his awareness will not prevail.

Attachment-abhorrence is an ‘effect’ and ignorance (of the self) is the ‘cause’!

Abhorrence towards bitter circumstances and attachment towards sweet ones is the nature of agnan (ignorance of the self). Bitter and sweet will not exist if agnan (ignorance of the self) leaves.

When faced with contrast, take nothing personally and don’t try to defend yourself. Defending one’s self is a vibrational relative of guilt. People will think what they like; do not feed fuel to the fire by reacting. Simply ask questions for clarity and in response say ‘Is that so?’ Take responsibility for the energy you brought to the situation, acknowledge the illusions without attachment, and move forward. Other people’s opinions are none of your business. Remember that each person is on thei

There is no insistence where there is pure love. Insistence is infatuation (deep attachment).

Once an opinion is formed, there will be attachment-abhorrence. A person without opinion is also without attachment-abhorrence.

Prakruti [the relative self, innate nature] has opinions and may store them but we should stay in an opinion-free state. ‘We’ are separate and the relative self is separate from us. ‘We’ should play our part as a separate entity. We shouldn’t get involved with those problems.

God has said for us to know bad, as bad and good, as good. But while knowing the bad, there should not be the slightest abhorrence towards it and while knowing the good, there should not be slightest attachment towards it. Without knowing bad, as bad, the good cannot be known as good.

To be free of insistence [free of forcing one's own opinion] is the path of Vitragta [attachment-free state, the enlightened one]. Quit insisting at all places. To even insist on the truth, God has considered it as ignorance. There is no insistence in ‘Us’ whatsoever!

After getting respect, one will get an equal amount of insult, if not in this life then the next. If you taste even the slightest of pleasure from this body-complex [pudgal], you will have to pay back an equivalent amount. Therefore become attachment-free (vitarag).

To say ‘I’ where I’ is not - is the greatest illusory attachment (raag).

Who are you without your labels and attachments to the issues you are passionate about? Remove the emotions, remove the beliefs and associations, and simply focus on the rational and practical applications that promote peaceful progression.

When attachment increases too much, dislike will arise.

It is the nature of the circumstances to disperse. If there is attachment with the circumstance, there will be abhorrence when they get dispersed.