Quotes about puns

How are you going to make it move? It doesn't have a – " "Be very quiet," advised the duke, "for it goes without saying."And, sure enough, as soon as they were all quite still, it began to move quickly through the streets, and in a very short time they arrived at the royal palace.

Khione’s eyes flared pure white. For once, she seemed at a loss for words. She stormed back up the stairs—literally. Halfway up, she turned into a blizzard and disappeared.

A so-called antimony war had been waged between French [Galenist] physicians and [alchemical, Paracelsian] iatrochemists since the beginning of the seventeenth century. What it lacked in bloodletting, this war made up for in bile.

Skinny jeans were only good if you had skinny genes.

It's unpleasantly like being drunk." "What's so unpleasant about being drunk?" "You ask a glass of water.

They talk about human rights until the rights include things they personally do not like as alternatives. There needs to be Frank discussions. And Shirley can join too because the pun works. The ideas of human beings of all demeanor and venues are at stake here.

Okay, you won our shitty little argument. Pass the world.

The first casualty of war is casual wear.

If I had to pick another career, I'd be an optometrist for potatoes. That's where the money is.

Also not the kind of place to hide a server.""Is that another pun?" She asked."No! I swear! I didn't mean that one."~Shell Game, Kingdom Keepers #5

Yeah 'ear 'ear," said George, with half a glance at Fred, the corner of whose mouth twitched.

Impersonating a quiet, gentle librarian like Barbara Gordon--You deserve to be taken out of circulation!

Puns are a form of humor with words.

I overreacted to praise, signing an autograph. I'd write a check to buy it back.

An apple a day feeds the tapeworm to stay.

I had a dream about you last night... we tried to joke but neither could make any sense. We realized that puns are present in every language, though not shared by any of them.

Let us revenge this withour pikes, ere we become rakes: for the gods know Ispeak this in hunger for bread, not in thirst for revenge.

Goodreads.com is actually about fiction not dreading goo. But I have a profile there, anyway...

Puns are the highest form of literature.

But the helmet had gold decoration, and the bespoke armorers had made a new gleaming breastplate with useless gold ornamentation on it. Sam Vimes felt like a class traitor every time he wore it. He hated being thought of as one of those people that wore stupid ornamental armor. It was gilt by association.

Beware of affect adorning vêtement of effect.

Anyway, my writer gang: they kind of did their comedy apprenticeship with me and, during that period, when they were young and impressionable, I think I infected them with my pun virus. They grew to enjoy puns, think puns, just as much as me. The problem is people don't really like puns any more, so I worry I've rendered the poor fuckers virtually unemployable.

Over the years, I have been subjected to many indignities, all for the sake of Art. If I ever catch him, I'm going to kill the guy.

If You Get Accidentally Locked, In the loo - Would you ‪#‎KnockYourSelfOut‬?

I was in my element, excuse the pun.

There is never a bad time for a pun. There’s also never really a good time for a pun. You might as well just stay braced for a pun at all times, and ride them when they come with as much grace as you can manage.The fact that you can replace ‘pun’ with ‘disaster’ in the last three rules says a lot about the human race.

What did the mat say to the door? You must be really aDOORable to open up to everyone who knock at you. And I welcome everyone and what do I get? People stepping all over me

Mr. Pettifor, I’ve brought you lunch, Sir.” “Leave it on my desk,” he grouses. “It’s your favorite, Sir, a Reuben with au jus,” I say softly.

Fuck, Christina.”“Yes, fuck Christina. I think she'd like that.

Wit and puns aren't just decor in the mind; they're essential signs that the mind knows it's on, recognizes its own software, can spot the bugs in its own program.

If I send all the books that I faithfully wrote overseas, would that, for any chance, be considered work-shipping??