Quotes about wit

Wit penetrates humor envelops. Wit is a function of verbal intelligence humor is imagination operating on good nature.

There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with w

By my hand and for the good of the state the bearer has done what has been done. Hmmmm ~~~ one should be careful what one writes for one never knows into whose hands it may fall.

Think of what makes you smile makes you happy... and do more of that shit.

There are two ways to dislike poetry: One is to dislike it the other is to read Pope.

If you have to explain your sense of humor, then you are performing for the wrong crowd.

Wit and puns aren't just decor in the mind; they're essential signs that the mind knows it's on, recognizes its own software, can spot the bugs in its own program.

Foolish minds will entertain you, but confuse minds will irritate you.

What good is it if they miss your face but not your mind?

His father was an ass and he is an ass. I imagine sooner than I should like I shall be playing uncle to a litter of asses.

A bunch of bad songs, make an awful whine.

You're maybe eighteen. Your mother didn't love you enough so you decided to pierce your lip and brand your body to piss her off. You hang around this band because they make you feel like you belong. And most days you wish you were in a band of your own, but you know that probably will never happen." I met his eyes waiting.I'm twenty. my mother has an assload of tattoos herself, she thinks its art. I have a lip ring because it turns girls on when I do this." He licked his lip, lingering on the me

When I need some striking inspiration about deep depression for my new painting, I just need to go to check my bank account...

Well, enough of this introspection. It’s depressing, quite frankly.

Everything can always be better! To know this is a wit! But if you also know that everything can always be worse and that is wisdom! Wisdom is to see both the lights and the shadows!

Words never fail. We hear them, we read them; they enter into the mind and become part of us for as long as we shall live. Who speaks reason to his fellowmen bestows it upon them. Who mouths inanity disorders thought for all who listen. There must be some minimum allowable dose of inanity beyond which the mind cannot remain reasonable. Irrationality, like buried chemical waste, sooner or later must seep into all the tissues of thought.

The length of words used to explain something does not determine the quality of the thought. Yet, I tend to believe that the shorter one can say something, the better it is.

The poet is a faker / Who's so good at his act / He even fakes the pain / Of pain he feels in fact.

The creative process is a love story that never ends. The ideas are like suitors competing for your attention. You may have relationships, with multiple ideas, at once. You may devote yourself completely to one idea, for a awhile, but the affairs will never end. There will always be more ideas to romance and more concepts to develop. And all for that wonderful moment when you get to gaze at the complete creation and hold perfection in your arms, for one blissful moment... before your inner-criti

Steven dreamed of you the very secondyou died(So the poem goes)and you may have visited himBut I'm pretty sure you don't believein poems

Too many scholars think of research as purely a cerebral pursuit. If we do nothing with the knowledge we gain, then we have wasted our study. Books can store information better than we can--what we we do that books cannot is interpret. So if one is not going to draw conclusions, then one might as well just leave the information in the texts.

Life is meaning less when you realized that you are about to die. Till then, everything negative however trifle they may be, depress you.

Everybody who is incapable of learning has taken to teaching.

For glory lit, and life alive, for goals unreached and aims to strive. All men must try, the wind did see. It is the test, it is the dream.

So you're a Shadowhunter,' Nate said. 'De Quincey told me that you lot were monsters.''Was that before or after he tried to eat you?' Will inquired.

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I took the road less traveled by and they CANCELLED MY FRIKKIN' SHOW. I totally shoulda took the road that had all those people on it. Damn.

Someone once told me that we move when it becomes less painful than staying where we are".

Being born in a stable does not make one a horse.

I'm living so far beyond my means that we may almost be said to be living apart.

The flesh is sad, alas, and I have read all the books.

It was as much a battle of wits and words as it was of mitts and swords.

Your wit never ceases to underwhelm me.

It's time to laugh at your nightmares and have nightmares of your laughter.

What have you done to your hair?” Mom’s broken voice said, pinning me back to this tiny hospitalroom.“Holy shit!” Icka patted her head as if searching. “You think the nurse stole it? She looked shady.

The small amount of foolery wise men have makes a great show.

Yeah, well, wish in one hand, crap in the other, and see which fills up first

You know, you're rather amusingly wrong.

There is, I believe, in every disposition a tendency to some particular evil, a natural defect, which not even the best education can overcome.""And your defect is a propensity to hate everybody.""And yours," he replied with a smile, "is wilfully to misunderstand them.

You can't teach an old dogma new tricks.

I have always been a huge admirer of my own work. I'm one of the funniest and most entertaining writers I know.

He had let me know time after time that he was a thinking man, a man of intellect and wit. Yet one unintended hungry look into my eyes and he betrayed each of his words he had carefully spoken to me. I knew it in that instant. He was a viscerally driven man. And one day, he would possess me.

Stupidity is brief and guileless, while wit equivocates and hides. Wit is a scoundrel, while stupidity is honest and sincere.

Soar with wit. Conquer with dignity. Handle with care.

It's common platitude that knowledge is neutral but every now and then it would be useful if it was on your side and not theirs.

I have always wanted to give you the world, so I started giving you pieces of the oceans that kept us apart.

True Wit is Nature to advantage dress'dWhat oft was thought, but ne'er so well express'd;Something whose truth convinced at sight we find,That gives us back the image of our mind.As shades more sweetly recommend the light,So modest plainness sets off sprightly wit.

Wit seduces by signaling intelligence without nerdiness.

I would rather be able to appreciate things I cannot have than to have things I am not able to appreciate.

Snobbery might sometimes look cool, like smoking, but the end result is usually a repelling one.

I did not know that mankind were suffering for want of gold. I have seen a little of it. I know that it is very malleable, but not so malleable as wit. A grain of gold will gild a great surface, but not so much as a grain of wisdom.

You can con God and get away with it, Granny said, if you do so with charm and wit. If you live your life with imagination and verve, God will play along just to see what outrageously entertaining thing you'll do next.

Art is art. You can take it or leave it. Liking it or not liking it does not make you a better person, and who you like or dislike results in the same thing.

There's a hell of a distance between wise-cracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.", Summer 1956]

There’s a fine line between support and stalking and let’s all stay on the right side of that.

I have only made this letter longer because I have not had the time to make it shorter.", 1657)

They say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit," Valkyrie said. China glanced at her. "They've obviously never met me.

Now what happens?" asked the man in black. "We face each other as God intended," Fezzik said. "No tricks, no weapons, skill against skill alone.""You mean you'll put down your rock and I'll put down my sword and we'll try to kill each other like civilized people, is that it?

A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.

A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.

Do you like to slide?" His voice was eager.Stair rails! Did he suspect me? I forced a sigh. "No, Majesty. I'm terrified of heights.""Oh." His polite tone had returned."I wish I could enjoy it. This fear of heights is an affliction."He nodded, a show of sympathy but not much interest. I was losing him."Especially," I added, "as I've grown taller.

If Christ were here there is one thing he would not be—a Christian.

Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.

I am not absentminded. It is the presence of mind that makes me unaware of everything else.

Heterosexuality is not normal, it's just common.

Humor keeps us alive. Humor and food. Don't forget food. You can go a week without laughing.

I don't deserve any credit for turning the other cheek as my tongue is always in it.

Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no fibs.

The covers of this book are too far apart.

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer

When men have come to the edge of a precipice, it is the lover of life who has the spirit to leap backwards, and only the pessimist who continues to believe in progress.

If you change who you are to suit other people, you may end up dressed for the wrong occasion

One says the things which one feels the need to say, and which the other will not understand: one speaks for oneself alone.

Digression is the soul of wit. Take the philosophic asides away from Dante, Milton or Hamlet's father's ghost and what stays is dry bones.

Don't explain computers to laymen. Simpler to explain sex to a virgin.

There are those who scoff at the schoolboy, calling him frivolous andshallow: Yet it was the schoolboy who said 'Faith is believing what youknow ain't so'.

Yeah you can have a word," said Harry savagely. "Good-bye.

Dearest creature in creation,Study English pronunciation.I will teach you in my verseSounds like corpse, corps, horse, and worse.I will keep you, Suzy, busy,Make your head with heat grow dizzy.Tear in eye, your dress will tear.So shall I! Oh hear my prayer.Just compare heart, beard, and heard,Dies and diet, lord and word,Sword and sward, retain and Britain.(Mind the latter, how it’s written.)Now I surely will not plague youWith such words as plaque and ague.But be careful how you speak:Say break

Ack!" I said.Fearless master of the witty dialogue, that's me.

Why hasn't anyone killed him yet?”“Dumb luck,” Wit said. “In that I’m lucky you’re all so dumb.

Give the People what they want - and they'll get what they deserve.

I was sorry to have my name mentioned as one of the great authors, because they have a sad habit of dying off. Chaucer is dead, Spencer is dead, so is Milton, so is Shakespeare, and I’m not feeling so well myself.

He wasn't aware of it but when he smiled he looked like an amiable bear. When he didn't smile he didn't look amiable

... fantasy is not practice for what is real—fantasy is the opiate of women.

He drew a circle that shut me out-Heretic , rebel, a thing to flout.But love and I had the wit to win:We drew a circle and took him In !From the poem " Outwitted

Frederick's wit was impressive. When a descendant of Ghengis Khan, who was wreaking havoc in the Muslim world, wrote threateningly that the holy Roman Emperor should surrender his lands and come to his court to become one of his vassals, Frederick replied that he'd think about it and to please hold open the position of falconer.

True wit is nature to advantage dressed;What oft was thought, but ne'er so well expressed.

He is not an ideal husband. I am his wife.

To be human is to seek beauty, Shallan. Do not despair, do not end the hunt because thorns grow in your way.

Jagged needle, wicked liesFrom under the skin, pluck evil eyes.Destiny change from pain and coldNow that you pay in blood and soul.

Lady Placida smiled. “History seldom takes note of serendipity when it records events. And from what I have heard, I suspect an argument could be made that you very much did earn the title.”“Many women have earned titles, Your Grace. It doesn't seem to have been a factor in whether or not they actually received them.”Lady Placida laughed. “True enough. But perhaps that is beginning to change.” She offered her hands. “It is a distinct pleasure to meet you, Steadholder.

I wouldn't do that," Silk advised. "Thinking about it isn't going to help, and it's only going to make you nervous.""Nervouser," Garion corrected. "I'm already nervous.""Is there such a word as "'nervouser'?" Silk asked Belgarath curiously. "There is now," Belgarath replied. "Garion just invented it.""I wish I could invent a word," Silk said admiringly to Garion.

The difference ‘twixt poet and coxcomb is precisely that the latter stops gaps like a ship fitter caulking seams, merely to keep the boat afloat, while the former doth his work as doth a man with a maid: he fills the gap, but with vigor, finesse, and care; there’s beauty and delight as well as utility in his plugging

Three,' reckoned the captain, 'ourselves make seven, counting Hawkins, here. Now, about honest hands?'Most likely Trelawney's own men," said the doctor; 'those he had picked up for himself, before he lit on Silver.'Nay,' replied the squire. 'Hands was one of mine.'I did think I could have trusted Hands,' added the captain.

Historical Re-creation, he thought glumly, as they picked their way across, under, over or through the boulders and insect-buzzing heaps of splintered timber, with streamlets running everywhere. Only we do it with people dressing up and running around with blunt weapons, and people selling hot dogs, and the girls all miserable because they can only dress up as wenches, wenching being the only job available to women in the olden days.

Ever since I discovered that my god given male member was going to give me no peace, I decided to give it no rest in return.

He lies down next to me.He says, 'You know - you have a face to die for/''Well, don't die,' I say, "we just met.

Enough about my beauty," Buttercup said. "Everybody always talks about how beautiful I am. I've got a mind, Westley. Talk about that.

If I be waspish, best beware my sting.

Any woman who is sure of her own wits, is a match, at any time, for a man who is not sure of his own temper.